I Found True Love...And You Will, Too!

So, I may have mentioned I’m engaged? Oh, you haven’t heard?? Guess what, I’M ENGAGED!!

Celebrating with Mom & Grams!

Clearly, I'm very excited about it.  Let’s just say, it’s something I’d been hoping would happen for quite some time, but as I’ve mentioned before, life and its curveballs got in the way a bit.  Still, I forced myself to have a little patience, saw things take a turn for the better about a year ago, and in May, the love of my life popped the big question…and (obvi), I said yes.  A big, overwhelming, couldn’t catch my breath, YES!  Of course, this means wedding planning is in full swing…and I’m hoping you don’t mind me “wedding-ifying” some of my upcoming Cuddleshrub Clues, because if several of my (apparently delusional) thoughts of planning a wedding on a budget have already blown up in my face, I’m thinking a few of you could use a dose of reality, too!

But, first, can I just take a moment to share a little of my engagement story?? It even comes with a video!  No, it’s not a video of an elaborately planned proposal that was edited by a professional and set to tear-jerking music…it’s just shaky, raw i-Phone video that was shot by my BFF during the moment I had never really believed would happen.  And, I want to share it with all the other girls (and boys!) out there that think it will never happen to them, that they’re not worth that much love, that they don’t deserve to fall head over heels, because it will and you are and you do.  So, here goes…

First, a little background:  I met Mark almost 4 years ago, in a bar in Philadelphia.  I know, so typical.  But, it was on a night that I was especially down, believing to my very core I was fat, ugly, un-loveable and meant to be alone.  I was 29 years old, and while I had stumbled onto the occasional date, I had never dated steadily and I had certainly never had a boyfriend.  Anyway, like I said, I was trying to convince my girlfriends of my un-loveableness, who just weren’t having it.  (Why do all my excuses at preventing my own happiness seem so silly when I say them out loud?) With their positive words of encouragement beginning to bolster my ego, plus with the help of a little liquid courage, I found myself suddenly empowered, and brave enough to dance with a very cute red-headed stranger – one of the ONLY guys on the dance floor (what can I say, I’m a sucker for a guy who’s got moves!).  The rest of the night is a blur of dancing, laughing, talking, a crazy taxi ride, maybe a few smooches, and eventually an exchange of phone numbers.  I didn’t know it then, but I was about to start the ride of my life!  We began texting, eventually dating long distance, then moving into together – and the whole time, I would periodically pinch myself, “Is this really happening? Am I falling in love?”

He cracks me up.

I did. We did.  I didn’t even realize it was happening.  But, one day I realized I was head over heels for this guy.  I have found someone who adores me, who makes me laugh, who appreciates my quirks and loves me for them, not in spite of them, who adds mushrooms to my Chinese food order without me reminding him – and I feel all of that for him!  Granted, we’ve had our moments, our crazy fights, our obstacles that tested our relationship, and holy crap, have I been scared we’d break up, or he’d give up on me, or worse I’d have to leave him… But, we’ve come through it, stronger and even more in love with each other.  Sigh.

Oh, the engagement!  Sorry, I got off track… Well, it’d been a few years, and as I not-so-subtly reminded Mark, neither of us was getting any younger, ahem, “don’t you think we should take the next step?”  I had, also not-so-subtly, told Mark that when said proposal happened, I would very much like my family, most of whom live several hours away, around me – I wanted to hug my mom, not just call her.  So when my mother and my brother came to visit on Mother’s Day weekend, and we got together with all of Mark’s family, I’d be lying if I didn’t think it was going to happen then.  And it didn’t.  So, I pushed it to the back of my mind, gave myself another mental deadline of the fall, and moved on.

Mark and Chad enjoying the day...pre-engagement!

Two weeks later, we headed to my home city of Rochester, NY for a week to visit my family and friends.  We drove in very early on a Saturday morning, stopped to see my mother at work, settled in at her place, and decided, since it was such a gorgeous day, we’d find a place to have lunch, maybe a cocktail or two outside.  Bleary-eyed from the 6 hour drive, I tried to rally, fixing my hair, re-touching my makeup, and (thank god) exchanging my yoga pants for a fun summery dress.  We picked up my BFF Chad and on the recommendation of his sister, hit a waterfront pub called Schooners.  We sat in the sun, along the water, and of course, I filled up on beers and a burger – couldn’t have been a dainty salad or something...

Chad headed off to the bathroom, Mark followed a few minutes later, and I settled back with my full belly to text my 2 besties from college about getting together the next day for a cookout.  The boys came back, and I’m half listening to them, half playing on my phone, when my friend Heather texts that she’d rather just order pizza the next day, because guess what, she’s pregnant!  This was, of course, amazing news, and a little bit of a miracle for my dear friend…so as I’m exclaiming to Mark and Chad, “Oh my goodness, Heather’s pregnant! I can’t believe it, what should I say back?”, my quick-witted, always-has-a-comeback boyfriend says, “Why don’t you tell her YOU’RE engaged?!” -- to which, I frowned with irritation and asked, “Why would I say that?”  That’s when I looked up and saw him on one knee, holding a shiny ring, and saying, “Because you are!” I’m pretttty sure I blacked out for a moment…the exact moment when Chad started recording.  So, I share this video with you, with the disclaimer that I had no idea what I was saying or very much recollection of those few minutes.  Also, I apologize for the “only-dogs-could-hear” high-pitched shrieking…

Um, super weird, no one around us even blinked.  You’d think with all the commotion, we’d get stares, maybe applause from the tables around us, but nope.  People just went about their meal.  I felt like I was having a strange twilight zone moment that merely added to my out-of-body experience.  Then the waitress dropped off the bill, like the biggest moment of my life hadn’t just happened…so, I blurted out, “We just got engaged!”  She was shocked, exclaiming, “Oh my god, that’s never happened to me before!”  YOU?? It’s never happened to me YOU?  How about it's never happened to me before!   I swear, yet another saga in my Bridget Jones related life.

I still called my mom on the phone, but we saw her just minutes later, celebrating with lots of hugs and champagne.  And, I got to celebrate with my girlfriends the next day, and my grandmother the day after that…just a week-load of happy.  Maybe it didn’t go down like scenes out of the romantic comedies I’ve idolized, or the novels I’ve poured through, but it was just perfect for me and Mark, the guy known for always having a comeback, and in this case, it was the best comeback of his, and MY life!  My guy certainly did it right. :)

So, not much of a Cuddleshrub Clue in this one, it was really for me to re-live and chronicle my most favorite moment.  But, if you take anything from this, believe it can happen for you, too.  You deserve that love, that moment.  And, when it does happen, because it WILL, it will be oh, so right.