When life gets hard, have a little patience.

Patience.  8 little letters.  So easy to type, to say, to handout as advice, and as a theory, it’s a good one.  But, boy, oh boy, is it difficult to have.  However, I'm proof that it actually DOES pay off, and today I’m here to share a little of my story and to help you find some patience of your own…

One year ago, life seemed pretty bleak.  I was 32, unemployed, broke, and the marriage and family I craved with my live-in boyfriend seemed a looong way away, considering our very sad financial state.  I had lost my job in March, and the unemployment wages I collected were barely enough to pay half the bills.  After a few months of applying to jobs that I actually wanted, I was now applying to jobs that just plain existed, anything that could give me a steady paycheck and help get us on our feet again.  I applied to jobs, only to learn I wasn’t what they were looking for.  I went on a few interviews, only to lose out in the last round to someone with more experience.  Already someone who struggles with self-confidence, this was beginning to really take a toll on my overall mental health.  Despite my college education, my 10+ years of professional and corporate experience, my damn affable personality, and my willingness and enthusiasm to learn just about anything, the only thing that was apparent to me was I was qualified to do nothing.  And as the days ticked off the calendar, and our bank accounts dipped lower, I felt like the rest of my life was on hold – no money, meant no marriage, which meant no kids…and I could just FEEL myself getting older and older and these dreams of mine getting further and further away. 

But, I’m fortunate enough to have some amazing family and friends in my life who refused to let me fall.  No matter how much I tried to distance myself from them, as in my head I couldn’t justify dragging them down with me, they remained steadfast.  Their words of encouragement and hope, even some financial support kept me afloat, and though I wanted “having patience” to hurry up and finish already, I would force myself to relax and wait it out.  Don’t get me wrong, I never threw in the towel, I kept applying to jobs, and doing odd jobs to keep me busy, and I never completely stopped bemoaning my situation, but I tried to believe in a light at the end of the tunnel.  And then one day, that light burst through, and life began to fall into place again.

I found not one, but TWO jobs!  They just seemed to fall in my lap at the exact same time.  And, I actually opted to forgo the one where I was most comfortable and had the most experience (and offered a little more money!), for the one where I would be venturing into new territory.  It’s proved to be one of the best decisions of my life, as I’m growing with a prosperous company, and for the first time in my life I’m able to enjoy a “normal” work schedule, with holidays and weekends off.  That very nice steady paycheck has allowed us to catch up with our bills, and for another first, I’ve been able to start SAVING money!  A few months ago, my fiancé and I started house hunting – and…yeah, you caught it, I said FIANCE!  In May, the man who stepped up and supported me emotionally and financially through that bleak 7 months, who never thought about leaving me, who picked me up when I was down, and mopped up my many bouts of tears, that man who I feel like I love more every day, asked me to be his wife.  (It’s a most hilarious and sweet and perfect proposal which I promise to share soon – I hope to take you on this wedding planning journey with me!)

So, the moral of this story, the Cuddleshrub Clue I ask you to take from this, is to have some patience.  I know it’s hard, and feels nearly impossible sometimes, but if there’s anything I’ve learned, it’s that life has some kind of a plan for you.  It CAN’T be bad forever, it eventually has to be YOUR turn to have some luck, and just when you think there’s no hope, there WILL be light.  I’ve seen it happen, experiencing it in more ways than one.  And, when it’s all said and done, take a moment to find the good in all the bad you’ve had to wade through…  I’m stronger, my self-confidence is growing, my relationship is stronger, I love my fiancé in ways I didn’t know how to love him before we weathered this storm, and I’ve learned to how to focus on the hope.  Life is a series of ups and downs, and next time I’m down, I’m going to take a deep breath, let myself lean on those who love me, and, you guessed it, have a little patience.